I saw the movie “The Shape of Water” yesterday with a friend. Have you seen it? A young woman pulls off what seems to be the impossible. How? With guts, determination, passion, and the help and support of her closest friends. She can’t do it without the support and help of her friends.
Are you trying to do something without help and support?
In late December, I decided to have a dry January. How could I do this? It’s not the impossible but I’m very social. I love a nice wine and in the last couple of years, I’ve learned about good cocktails. Winter time is a time for hibernation. But isolation is the enemy of health and wealth so for me, winter time is a time for socializing!
Sure, I don’t drink every day but it’s a habit to have a glass of wine while cooking a nice meal with friends, and I love meeting friends for a cocktail and dinner. So, I asked a couple of friends to join me. I wasn’t sure what to expect but when they eagerly agreed, I was relieved to know I would have a support group, people to help me!
Why do dry January?
I wanted to re-set, re-ground, and re-center for the new year and part of that was to eliminate alcohol.
It also included releasing a lot of stuff that I had accumulated so there have been several trips to the Goodwill and my trash bin has been full each week.
Dry January helped a great deal when I heard a report on Weekend Edition about the health benefits and the reporter and the doctor being interviewed were also doing “dry” January. Read or listen here.
I’m assessing and cleaning up relationships and I’m spending more time on the cushion and the mat, meditating and practicing not reacting. In martial arts, the sensei’s first response when confronted is “I do not want to fight”. This is one of my mantra’s when I see something on social media that sets me off or I feel my tail feathers ruffled by another story in the media. How can I respond with love? When love truly is the answer no matter the question, how can I fight?
I’m finding I am calling on a lot of guts, determination, and passion to stay dry, to say goodbye to “stuff”, and to stay true to love, first and foremost self-love, and not react.
Where do you find your help and support?
Over the last couple of weeks, my friends and I have been calling and texting each other to share stories of our adventures. We’ve discovered we have more time, we really like refreshing mock-tail alternatives, and we are sleeping less and well. It’s wonderful to know we have each other’s backs and are here for each other in this endeavor and more. Our relationships are deepening and growing.
This wonderful experience is what happens when we open ourselves up in any relationship. When we expose where we are, what we want to change, and ask for support, we learn, we grow, and we love more deeply – ourselves and others. We see ourselves and others more fully and we are all the better for it.
In the movie, “The Shape of Water” the young woman never feels truly seen until she encounters the “creature” being held captive in the lab. Upon being seen, she exposes herself for the first time and experiences love for herself and another.
It’s a beautiful, lovely story. I saw it with one of the women who’s in “dry January” with me.
I hope you’ll see it. I hope you’ll live it.